Understand?

In hard times, how to resolve situations that leave the sad soul?

I think it was a fool I have chosen this life, I suffer like a plague seeking the long way of satisfaction. Even if I fight like a vulture who shares food with the pigs, don’t get recognized by anyone. What kind of holy condemns me? What kind of curse cast against me? I know I don’t have guilt come into the world, not me who came on their own, but I believe it is my fault the choices I made. It's what everyone does, choosing the wrong paths and then put the blame on someone or some entity. But anyone can find a way to reflect and try to at least pretend that all is well. Even the next day, the whole shit again disturb the mind, and make the quiet almost impossible to have.

I can’t put the blame on anyone but myself. I can not blame anything that has been denigrated because of me. I have to learn to put things right, do it right, so I can complexion inner peace. The way it really is harder than I imagine, but I don’t think I can continue making mistakes. One day I can tell someone, don’t know who, who won a bloody struggle in my life, but I'm too old to celebrate my victory.